radio game

a myraid of characters wander around the mind of an innocent bystander

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BAGEL JOE: Go, my pastry minions! Attack them!

ROYCE: Wait, dude, what is your problem?


FRED: Meatball, save us!

MEATBALL: Okay, I'll use my teleportation module.

Wiggy wiggy wiggy wiggy

FRED: We're safe!

ROYCE: Hold on. Now we're on a desert island.

MEATBALL: Sorry, let me reset my teleportation module.

ROYCE: This better be quick.

MEATBALL: It broke.

ROYCE: Well, I've done some cross-referencing research based on the clue that Cats gave us, and there are three possible locations he could be. First, he could be in Central America in the Temple of the Moon. Second, he could be in the small town of La Luna in northern France. Or, he could be down the street in the basement of Bagel Joe's.

MEATBALL: Let's go to Central America, porque yo hablo espanol.

FRED: I say we check Bagel Joe's first, since it's closest.

ROYCE: Sounds like a plan.

They walk down the street.

FRED: Hey, Bagel Joe, can we check out your basement for a couple seconds?

BAGEL JOE: First you must defeat my army of Cyber-Bagels! Ha ha ha ha ha!

MEATBALL: Hey guys! Look what we got in the mail!

ROYCE: Hmm. I wonder what it is. "To Whom it May Concern: Hello this is Cats who is this. I am on the moon. Really really. The end." Interesting.

FRED: Why would Cats tell us exactly where he is?

MEATBALL: Maybe it's a clue, like on Carmen Sandiego.

FRED: But what could it possibly mean?

ROYCE: I guess we'll have to do some research.

MEATBALL: Boo hiss. Why can't we just know everything like those gumshoes?

CATS: Aha! By using this map, I have determined our location!

BLORE: Clever. Where are we?

CATS: We are on the moon!

BLORE: I always thought you were kind of a space cadet.

CATS: Now I must send a message to Royce, Meatball, and Fred, telling them that I am on the moon, so that they will come try to rescue you and fall into my clever trap.

BLORE: They don't call 'em evil overlords for nothing.

CATS: Hmm. Perhaps my lair is too secret. I may have to tell them where it is so they can find it.

BLORE: Indeed. Where are we, by the way?

CATS: I don't know. This location is so secret, even I don't know where it is.

BLORE: That's a problem.

MEATBALL: Okay, I've got a plan. Let's go into Cats' secret lair and rescue Blore.

ROYCE: Um, that's what we wanted to do. But we don't know how to do it.

MEATBALL: How hard can it be? We just go in the lair and come back out with Blore!

FRED: But we don't know where the lair is. That's why they call it a secret lair.


ROYCE: And for all we know, that's exactly what Cats wants us to do.

In the lair . . .

CATS: Hee hee hee! That is what I want them to do!

BLORE: How convienient.

ROYCE: Well, what are we going to do about Investigator Blore and Cats?

MEATBALL: We could not talk about it and pretend it didn't happen.

ROYCE: Um, I don't think that's the best idea.

FRED: Well, he did this before, with me, if you remember. He must be up to something.

SHAKESPEARE: I remember it well.

ROYCE: Will you get out of here?

SHAKESPEARE: By my troth, I am off.

ROYCE: Great. So, what's the plan?

MEATBALL: I don't think we ever came up with one.

FRED: You know, I think he's right.